Global Warming: An Example of Cargo-Cult Science

Just finished reading Feynman's classic talk on Cargo-Cult Science. It seems to me that the information and data hiding that has plagued global warming "science" out of purely financial and personal interest is an absolutely perfect fit for what Feynman calls "Cargo-Cult Science."

Here's a few excerpts:

... if you're doing an experiment, you should report everything that you think might make it invalid - not only what you think is right about it...

Details that could throw doubt on your interpretation must be given, if you know them. You must do the best you can - if you know anything at all wrong, or possibly wrong - to explain it. If you make a theory, for example, and advertise it, or put it out, then you must also put down all the facts that disagree with it, as well as those that agree with it...

In summary, the idea is to try to give all of the information to help others to judge the value of your contribution; not just the information that leads to judgment in one particular direction or another...

We've learned from experience that the truth will out. Other experimenters will repeat your experiment and find out whether you were wrong or right. Nature's phenomena will agree or they'll disagree with your theory. And, although you may gain some temporary fame and excitement, you will not gain a good reputation as a scientist if you haven't tried to be very careful in this kind of work.

And it's this type of integrity, this kind of care not to fool yourself, that is missing to a large extent in much of the research in Cargo Cult Science...

And his parting words:

I wish to you... the good luck to be somewhere where you are free to maintain this kind of integrity I have described, and where you do not feel forced by a need to maintain your position in the organization, or financial support, or so on, to lose your integrity. May you have that freedom.

Reading his talk has actually made me feel sad for the global warming scientists. They have fooled themselves into believing that hiding the measurement data is a good idea. They were probably originally motivated by greed (for nice government funds) and/or personal recognition (published papers and Nobel "Prizes"), so they established complete control over all the measured data.

However, they are now trapped in their own webs of deceit; as more and more scientists are turning against their cargo cult practices, they are starting to feel desparate. When the truth comes out (and the actual data is finally published), they'll lose their entire careers, so it's only natural for them to continue the ruse and delay the inevitable.

NCIS is done

Well, well...

Turns out NCIS' Christmas episode was complete trash. A Christian performing an "honor killing" of his (Marine) Muslim brother, airing just a few weeks after a Muslim member of the U.S. Army gunned down innocent U.S. soldiers and bystanders in the name of his religion.

Yet, NCIS laid on the "Muslims good, Christians bad" rhetoric with a sickening amount of impossibilities. A Christian pastor (with an offshore bank account, no less) pays other Marines to beat up his Muslim son - which the Marines are happy to do because, hey, he's Muslim and they're prejudiced. The Christian wife of the Muslim cheats on him while he's abroad. The Christian brother of the Muslim kills him. Ducky's monologues - usually a high point of the show - are all about how the Christian God and the Muslim god are really the same, and it's such a pity that all Christian soldiers are so bigoted, and the poor Muslims are just so persecuted... A Muslim chaplain was thrown into this episode, explaining in detail how Muslims are entirely peaceful, and hold the same exact principles as the Marines, and that it is the ignorance and hatred so ingrained in the Christians that causes all this strife. Ziva - supposedly an Israeli - sympathizes with the Muslim chaplain, and doesn't ever seem to bring up the fact that Muslims keep attacking Israelis even during ceasefires.

Let's have a little interjection of reality, here. How many Christian "honor killings" have you ever heard of? None? Me, neither. Let's see... what's the most recent event where one soldier killed a fellow soldier on the basis of their religion? Oh, yes, the Fort Hood shooting, where a MUSLIM psychiatrist shot 43 people, killing 13 of them (including a pregnant female officer), after shouting "Allahu Akbar!" ("Allah is the greatest!"). The Muslim reaction to this has been mixed; some have claimed it was wrong because the consequences could be bad. Other Muslim groups rejoiced at the news, saying that more Muslim U.S. soldiers should "follow in [his] footsteps" and that "fighting against the U.S. army is an Islamic duty."

The only logical explanation for NCIS' reversal regarding Muslims is political. Last year, NCIS suddenly reversed their portrayal of Muslims; up until then, Muslims were sometimes innocent and sometimes suicide bombers, just like in real life. Starting last year, Muslims were always innocent, and it was usually the prejudice of non-Muslim soldiers that was the problem. This year, Christians are the suicide bombers and murderers, and Muslims are the innocent pacifists being massacred.

Yeah, right.

It makes me wonder how much money Commie Obama paid to CBS. I can tell you this much, CBS has lost this viewer of NCIS for good. They've lost many others over this episode, too. So, CBS, was selling your soul worth it?

More info: NCIS Goes Pro-Muslim for Their Christmas Show 2009 - Unbelievable! If you want to voice your opinion, here's the CBS contact form.

Obama

If you voted for Obama because he's black, then you're racist!

Somebody had to say it!

mBank? Fifth/Third? No contest!

I've been a regular patron of Fifth/Third for 15 years, at least. Back then, they were Old Kent, and they helped my mom get a mortgage for her house (back when her income wasn't the greatest). Old Kent was so helpful, our whole family became loyal customers. When I started my business, there was no question about who would get my business checking account.

However, when Old Kent got bought out by Fifth/Third, everything changed. Their customer service became an absolute joke. They offered me a wonderful "special rate" of 19% for a small business loan. They started charging (without warning) fees on every debit card usage. They mistakenly added finance charges to my 5/3 MasterCard (when I hadn't bought anything). They added overdraft protection to my checking account, when I had explicitly stated I didn't want it on there. They warned me that they would charge me fees if I ever spoke to a teller instead of using the ATM. They would send statements to the wrong address after I made absolutely sure they had the right address, and then refuse to reverse the late charges.

I started using mBank. Just a little at first. I couldn't help but notice how nice their tellers were. They remembered me - and I only go into the bank once every other month or so! I've never had a problem with them charging me ridiculous fees caused by computer errors, and then hassling me when removing them. It's been like a breath of fresh air. I am always, always impressed with the friendliness and helpfulness of their employees. Their web site doesn't look as pretty as 5/3, but it actually works better.

Last week, I took my leave of Fifth Third, permanently. I will never, ever do business with them again. I stood by them over the years; I still remember a whole slew of people leaving when they pulled the debit card fee stunt, but I stuck it out. My last experience with them, however, was the last straw. According to my estimates, I've lost about $65 from fraudulent charges by Fifth Third over the years. This last episode only accounts for $11.35 of that, but I've had it.

Fifth Third: you're fired.

mBank, welcome to the family. You just got my business.

Unresolved BSOD

This morning, one of my development machines died unexpectedly from a BSOD. I haven't been able to find any information from Google, so I'm posting my experience here for others to find.

The culprit seems to be ipnat.sys, which is interesting because even though I have a complex network setup, Windows doesn't handle the NATing. I'm running XP SP3 on this laptop, with ipnat.sys 5.1.2600.5512, modified Monday, April 14, 2008, 12:27:16 AM. The OCA failed because I had the minidump open in WinDbg at the time (oops).

Detailed network setup at the time of crash (10 adapters total):

1. 1394 (FireWire) port - disabled
2. Builtin wireless - disabled
3. Dialup connection via physical modem - enabled but phone line not plugged in
4. USB wireless - active, with Internet access
5. NIC - active, local access only
6. PCMCIA cell tower wireless ("dialup") - enabled but not inserted
7. VMWare VMNet1 for virtual machines - enabled but not active (no virtual machines were running)
8. VMWare VMNet8 for virtual machines - same
9. VPN virtual adapter for OpenVPN connections - disabled; no longer used
10. VPN virtual adapter #2 for OpenVPN - same

VMWare and OpenVPN both handle their own NAT, and adapter #4 is *not* shared over the network on #5, so I don't know why Windows was doing something with NAT.

Anyway, here's the WinDbg analysis:

Microsoft (R) Windows Debugger Version 6.9.0003.113 X86
Copyright (c) Microsoft Corporation. All rights reserved.


Loading Dump File [C:\Documents and Settings\Stephen Cleary\Local Settings\Temp\WERe5f9.dir00\Mini080208-01.dmp]
Mini Kernel Dump File: Only registers and stack trace are available

Symbol search path is: SRV*c:\symbols*http://msdl.microsoft.com/download/symbols;C:\Work\RAC\RAMDisk\Project\debug;symsrv*symsrv.dll*c:\symbols*http://msdl.microsoft.com/download/symbols
Executable search path is:
Windows XP Kernel Version 2600 (Service Pack 3) UP Free x86 compatible
Product: WinNt
Built by: 2600.xpsp.080413-2111
Kernel base = 0x804d7000 PsLoadedModuleList = 0x80553fc0
Debug session time: Sat Aug  2 07:35:32.341 2008 (GMT-4)
System Uptime: 0 days 20:28:21.531
Loading Kernel Symbols
...............................................................................................................................................................
Loading User Symbols
Loading unloaded module list
...............
*******************************************************************************
*                                                                             *
*                        Bugcheck Analysis                                    *
*                                                                             *
*******************************************************************************

Use !analyze -v to get detailed debugging information.

BugCheck D1, {3a003e, 2, 1, ed878886}

*************************************************************************
***                                                                   ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Your debugger is not using the correct symbols                 ***
***                                                                   ***
***    In order for this command to work properly, your symbol path   ***
***    must point to .pdb files that have full type information.      ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Certain .pdb files (such as the public OS symbols) do not      ***
***    contain the required information.  Contact the group that      ***
***    provided you with these symbols if you need this command to    ***
***    work.                                                          ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Type referenced: mssmbios!_SMBIOS_DATA_OBJECT                  ***
***                                                                   ***
*************************************************************************
*************************************************************************
***                                                                   ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Your debugger is not using the correct symbols                 ***
***                                                                   ***
***    In order for this command to work properly, your symbol path   ***
***    must point to .pdb files that have full type information.      ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Certain .pdb files (such as the public OS symbols) do not      ***
***    contain the required information.  Contact the group that      ***
***    provided you with these symbols if you need this command to    ***
***    work.                                                          ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Type referenced: mssmbios!_SMBIOS_DATA_OBJECT                  ***
***                                                                   ***
*************************************************************************
*************************************************************************
***                                                                   ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Your debugger is not using the correct symbols                 ***
***                                                                   ***
***    In order for this command to work properly, your symbol path   ***
***    must point to .pdb files that have full type information.      ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Certain .pdb files (such as the public OS symbols) do not      ***
***    contain the required information.  Contact the group that      ***
***    provided you with these symbols if you need this command to    ***
***    work.                                                          ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Type referenced: mssmbios!_SMBIOS_DATA_OBJECT                  ***
***                                                                   ***
*************************************************************************
*************************************************************************
***                                                                   ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Your debugger is not using the correct symbols                 ***
***                                                                   ***
***    In order for this command to work properly, your symbol path   ***
***    must point to .pdb files that have full type information.      ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Certain .pdb files (such as the public OS symbols) do not      ***
***    contain the required information.  Contact the group that      ***
***    provided you with these symbols if you need this command to    ***
***    work.                                                          ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Type referenced: mssmbios!_SMBIOS_DATA_OBJECT                  ***
***                                                                   ***
*************************************************************************
*************************************************************************
***                                                                   ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Your debugger is not using the correct symbols                 ***
***                                                                   ***
***    In order for this command to work properly, your symbol path   ***
***    must point to .pdb files that have full type information.      ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Certain .pdb files (such as the public OS symbols) do not      ***
***    contain the required information.  Contact the group that      ***
***    provided you with these symbols if you need this command to    ***
***    work.                                                          ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Type referenced: mssmbios!_SMBIOS_DATA_OBJECT                  ***
***                                                                   ***
*************************************************************************
*************************************************************************
***                                                                   ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Your debugger is not using the correct symbols                 ***
***                                                                   ***
***    In order for this command to work properly, your symbol path   ***
***    must point to .pdb files that have full type information.      ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Certain .pdb files (such as the public OS symbols) do not      ***
***    contain the required information.  Contact the group that      ***
***    provided you with these symbols if you need this command to    ***
***    work.                                                          ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Type referenced: mssmbios!_SMBIOS_DATA_OBJECT                  ***
***                                                                   ***
*************************************************************************
*************************************************************************
***                                                                   ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Your debugger is not using the correct symbols                 ***
***                                                                   ***
***    In order for this command to work properly, your symbol path   ***
***    must point to .pdb files that have full type information.      ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Certain .pdb files (such as the public OS symbols) do not      ***
***    contain the required information.  Contact the group that      ***
***    provided you with these symbols if you need this command to    ***
***    work.                                                          ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Type referenced: mssmbios!_SMBIOS_DATA_OBJECT                  ***
***                                                                   ***
*************************************************************************
*************************************************************************
***                                                                   ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Your debugger is not using the correct symbols                 ***
***                                                                   ***
***    In order for this command to work properly, your symbol path   ***
***    must point to .pdb files that have full type information.      ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Certain .pdb files (such as the public OS symbols) do not      ***
***    contain the required information.  Contact the group that      ***
***    provided you with these symbols if you need this command to    ***
***    work.                                                          ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Type referenced: mssmbios!_SMBIOS_DATA_OBJECT                  ***
***                                                                   ***
*************************************************************************
*************************************************************************
***                                                                   ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Your debugger is not using the correct symbols                 ***
***                                                                   ***
***    In order for this command to work properly, your symbol path   ***
***    must point to .pdb files that have full type information.      ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Certain .pdb files (such as the public OS symbols) do not      ***
***    contain the required information.  Contact the group that      ***
***    provided you with these symbols if you need this command to    ***
***    work.                                                          ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Type referenced: nt!_KPRCB                                     ***
***                                                                   ***
*************************************************************************
*************************************************************************
***                                                                   ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Your debugger is not using the correct symbols                 ***
***                                                                   ***
***    In order for this command to work properly, your symbol path   ***
***    must point to .pdb files that have full type information.      ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Certain .pdb files (such as the public OS symbols) do not      ***
***    contain the required information.  Contact the group that      ***
***    provided you with these symbols if you need this command to    ***
***    work.                                                          ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Type referenced: nt!_KPRCB                                     ***
***                                                                   ***
*************************************************************************
Probably caused by : ipnat.sys ( ipnat!NatDereferenceAddressPoolEntry+ce )

Followup: MachineOwner
---------

kd> !analyze -v
*******************************************************************************
*                                                                             *
*                        Bugcheck Analysis                                    *
*                                                                             *
*******************************************************************************

DRIVER_IRQL_NOT_LESS_OR_EQUAL (d1)
An attempt was made to access a pageable (or completely invalid) address at an
interrupt request level (IRQL) that is too high.  This is usually
caused by drivers using improper addresses.
If kernel debugger is available get stack backtrace.
Arguments:
Arg1: 003a003e, memory referenced
Arg2: 00000002, IRQL
Arg3: 00000001, value 0 = read operation, 1 = write operation
Arg4: ed878886, address which referenced memory

Debugging Details:
------------------

*************************************************************************
***                                                                   ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Your debugger is not using the correct symbols                 ***
***                                                                   ***
***    In order for this command to work properly, your symbol path   ***
***    must point to .pdb files that have full type information.      ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Certain .pdb files (such as the public OS symbols) do not      ***
***    contain the required information.  Contact the group that      ***
***    provided you with these symbols if you need this command to    ***
***    work.                                                          ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Type referenced: mssmbios!_SMBIOS_DATA_OBJECT                  ***
***                                                                   ***
*************************************************************************
*************************************************************************
***                                                                   ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Your debugger is not using the correct symbols                 ***
***                                                                   ***
***    In order for this command to work properly, your symbol path   ***
***    must point to .pdb files that have full type information.      ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Certain .pdb files (such as the public OS symbols) do not      ***
***    contain the required information.  Contact the group that      ***
***    provided you with these symbols if you need this command to    ***
***    work.                                                          ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Type referenced: mssmbios!_SMBIOS_DATA_OBJECT                  ***
***                                                                   ***
*************************************************************************
*************************************************************************
***                                                                   ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Your debugger is not using the correct symbols                 ***
***                                                                   ***
***    In order for this command to work properly, your symbol path   ***
***    must point to .pdb files that have full type information.      ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Certain .pdb files (such as the public OS symbols) do not      ***
***    contain the required information.  Contact the group that      ***
***    provided you with these symbols if you need this command to    ***
***    work.                                                          ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Type referenced: mssmbios!_SMBIOS_DATA_OBJECT                  ***
***                                                                   ***
*************************************************************************
*************************************************************************
***                                                                   ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Your debugger is not using the correct symbols                 ***
***                                                                   ***
***    In order for this command to work properly, your symbol path   ***
***    must point to .pdb files that have full type information.      ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Certain .pdb files (such as the public OS symbols) do not      ***
***    contain the required information.  Contact the group that      ***
***    provided you with these symbols if you need this command to    ***
***    work.                                                          ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Type referenced: mssmbios!_SMBIOS_DATA_OBJECT                  ***
***                                                                   ***
*************************************************************************
*************************************************************************
***                                                                   ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Your debugger is not using the correct symbols                 ***
***                                                                   ***
***    In order for this command to work properly, your symbol path   ***
***    must point to .pdb files that have full type information.      ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Certain .pdb files (such as the public OS symbols) do not      ***
***    contain the required information.  Contact the group that      ***
***    provided you with these symbols if you need this command to    ***
***    work.                                                          ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Type referenced: mssmbios!_SMBIOS_DATA_OBJECT                  ***
***                                                                   ***
*************************************************************************
*************************************************************************
***                                                                   ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Your debugger is not using the correct symbols                 ***
***                                                                   ***
***    In order for this command to work properly, your symbol path   ***
***    must point to .pdb files that have full type information.      ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Certain .pdb files (such as the public OS symbols) do not      ***
***    contain the required information.  Contact the group that      ***
***    provided you with these symbols if you need this command to    ***
***    work.                                                          ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Type referenced: mssmbios!_SMBIOS_DATA_OBJECT                  ***
***                                                                   ***
*************************************************************************
*************************************************************************
***                                                                   ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Your debugger is not using the correct symbols                 ***
***                                                                   ***
***    In order for this command to work properly, your symbol path   ***
***    must point to .pdb files that have full type information.      ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Certain .pdb files (such as the public OS symbols) do not      ***
***    contain the required information.  Contact the group that      ***
***    provided you with these symbols if you need this command to    ***
***    work.                                                          ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Type referenced: mssmbios!_SMBIOS_DATA_OBJECT                  ***
***                                                                   ***
*************************************************************************
*************************************************************************
***                                                                   ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Your debugger is not using the correct symbols                 ***
***                                                                   ***
***    In order for this command to work properly, your symbol path   ***
***    must point to .pdb files that have full type information.      ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Certain .pdb files (such as the public OS symbols) do not      ***
***    contain the required information.  Contact the group that      ***
***    provided you with these symbols if you need this command to    ***
***    work.                                                          ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Type referenced: mssmbios!_SMBIOS_DATA_OBJECT                  ***
***                                                                   ***
*************************************************************************
*************************************************************************
***                                                                   ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Your debugger is not using the correct symbols                 ***
***                                                                   ***
***    In order for this command to work properly, your symbol path   ***
***    must point to .pdb files that have full type information.      ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Certain .pdb files (such as the public OS symbols) do not      ***
***    contain the required information.  Contact the group that      ***
***    provided you with these symbols if you need this command to    ***
***    work.                                                          ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Type referenced: nt!_KPRCB                                     ***
***                                                                   ***
*************************************************************************
*************************************************************************
***                                                                   ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Your debugger is not using the correct symbols                 ***
***                                                                   ***
***    In order for this command to work properly, your symbol path   ***
***    must point to .pdb files that have full type information.      ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Certain .pdb files (such as the public OS symbols) do not      ***
***    contain the required information.  Contact the group that      ***
***    provided you with these symbols if you need this command to    ***
***    work.                                                          ***
***                                                                   ***
***    Type referenced: nt!_KPRCB                                     ***
***                                                                   ***
*************************************************************************

WRITE_ADDRESS:  003a003e

CURRENT_IRQL:  2

FAULTING_IP:
ipnat!NatDereferenceAddressPoolEntry+ce
ed878886 894804          mov     dword ptr [eax+4],ecx

CUSTOMER_CRASH_COUNT:  1

DEFAULT_BUCKET_ID:  DRIVER_FAULT

BUGCHECK_STR:  0xD1

TRAP_FRAME:  f78b6dac -- (.trap 0xfffffffff78b6dac)
ErrCode = 00000002
eax=003a003a ebx=8a4eef58 ecx=e75b94c8 edx=00000000 esi=8a4260e8 edi=8a4260e8
eip=ed878886 esp=f78b6e20 ebp=f78b6e30 iopl=0         nv up ei pl zr na pe nc
cs=0008  ss=0010  ds=0023  es=0023  fs=0030  gs=0000             efl=00010246
ipnat!NatDereferenceAddressPoolEntry+0xce:
ed878886 894804          mov     dword ptr [eax+4],ecx ds:0023:003a003e=????????
Resetting default scope

LAST_CONTROL_TRANSFER:  from ed878886 to 80540683

STACK_TEXT: 
f78b6dac ed878886 badb0d00 00000000 ed52b35c nt!KiTrap0E+0x233
f78b6e30 ed87d965 8a4eef58 8a4260e8 8a4eefb8 ipnat!NatDereferenceAddressPoolEntry+0xce
f78b6e44 ed87f601 8a4eef58 fdfd0128 ed87f266 ipnat!NatDeleteTicket+0x2f
f78b6e88 804ffd88 ed887da0 00000000 df47447e ipnat!NatTimerRoutine+0x39b
f78b6fa4 804ffe9f 99893074 000000ab ffdff000 nt!KiTimerListExpire+0x122
f78b6fd0 80541b8d 80552da0 00000000 0047f961 nt!KiTimerExpiration+0xaf
f78b6ff4 8054185a ba43e9c8 00000000 00000000 nt!KiRetireDpcList+0x46
f78b6ff8 ba43e9c8 00000000 00000000 00000000 nt!KiDispatchInterrupt+0x2a
WARNING: Frame IP not in any known module. Following frames may be wrong.
f78b6ffc 00000000 00000000 00000000 00000000 0xba43e9c8


STACK_COMMAND:  kb

FOLLOWUP_IP:
ipnat!NatDereferenceAddressPoolEntry+ce
ed878886 894804          mov     dword ptr [eax+4],ecx

SYMBOL_STACK_INDEX:  1

SYMBOL_NAME:  ipnat!NatDereferenceAddressPoolEntry+ce

FOLLOWUP_NAME:  MachineOwner

MODULE_NAME: ipnat

IMAGE_NAME:  ipnat.sys

DEBUG_FLR_IMAGE_TIMESTAMP:  48025786

FAILURE_BUCKET_ID:  0xD1_W_ipnat!NatDereferenceAddressPoolEntry+ce

BUCKET_ID:  0xD1_W_ipnat!NatDereferenceAddressPoolEntry+ce

Followup: MachineOwner
---------

Some excellent math jokes!

Why did the chicken cross the Möbius strip? To get to the same side!

Life is complex: it has both real and imaginary components.

There are 10 kinds of people in the world: those who understand binary and those who don't.

92.734587% of all statistics claim a precision of results that is not justified by the method employed.

Let epsilon be less than 0.

He thinks he's really smooth, but he's only C^1.

One day, Jesus said to his disciples: "The Kingdom of Heaven is like 3x squared plus 8x minus 9." Peter remarked: "Ah, another one of His parabolas."

A polar bear is just a rectangular bear after a coordinate transform.

Integral z-squared dz
from 1 to the cube root of 3
times the cosine
of three pi over 9
equals log of the cube root of 'e'.

Parallel lines never meet, unless you bend one or both of them.

My love for you is a monotonic increasing function of time!

Telemarketing

Well, I have an admission to make. I had to work for a little more than a month at a telemarketing position. While that was not the most enjoyable job in the world, I did get to learn all about the legal ins and outs of telemarketing. One of the most common questions people have about telemarketing is how to stop it. It is not really as difficult as it seems. There are four Do Not Call (DNC) lists that telemarketers abide by:

1. The Direct Marketing Association (costs $3.00, and also implicitly places you on a Do Not Mail list as well)
2. State DNC list (probably free)
3. National DNC list (free)
4. Each company usually has their own private DNC list as well; when you ask a telemarketer to be placed on the DNC list, you go on their private DNC list. Of course, that won't prevent you from getting calls from other companies.

However, there are two facts about DNC lists that people usually don't know:

1. They're only good for five years. For example, if you get on the National DNC list, you'll have to get back on it every five years.
2. The following telemarketers are not affected by the DNC lists:
   1. Non-profit companies
   2. Politicians
   3. Surveys
   4. Companies with whom you have an Established Business Relationship (EBR)

Now, have a guess at how your mortgage holder or bank can bypass the DNC lists. That's right, you have an EBR with them! But all is not lost - you can prevent calls from those companies, too... Every company that can subject you to telemarketing calls is required to send out a Privacy Act Notice twice a year. You know - that thing you just throw away. Well, if you were to actually respond to it stating that you don't want your phone number and address contacted by salespeople, then that company won't legally be able to telemarket you. So, to prevent telemarketing, just do two things:

1. Get on the National DNC list.
2. Respond to Privacy Act Notices.

Too much of a pain? Well, you can settle for just getting on the private DNC lists. Here's some tips on what to say to telemarketers:

1. Never say "not interested." This is the most common response, but they'll just call you back in a few weeks with a different offer.
2. Explicitly ask to be placed on the "Do Not Call" list. They are then required to read this paragraph confirming your name and address, apologizing, letting you know it may take up to 30 days to take effect, phone number of the company they're representing, etc. Let them finish.
3. Be nice! There have been situations where people were... ah, accidentally... placed on the Spanish callback list... and it's just coincidental that these people were absolute jerks...

Well, that's it for today! Merry Christmas! ;)